To my son, a special night
...He was crying, for the reasons he did not know...
...he didn't know what for...
He wasn't exactly sad, depressed, or hurt, but he was crying...
Maybe for the unknown world, for the unknown future...
...for how weak he is with his teanage body,
...for how fragile he is with his teenage mental strength ...
towards the world, towards history, toward now, towards the establishment, toward the huge momentum the world is moving ...
He mumbled: "I just want to be happy, I dont want anything else..."
The poor soul is lost... in his limited brain-power, overwhelmed by the immense complexity of the world...
He almost fell asleep, yet, he was speaking, and spoken to...
What a strange world! What a strange being! Life is so pale in contrast to the colorful nature.
*****
I can't help thinking of my teenage...
I cannot remember ever I had so much confusion.
Why are we so different? Why is there so much more confusion, yet so little motivation for him?
*****
He is creeping for light ... even a candlelight would help ... but he is looking within, where there is only darkness, confusion and frustration.
Look-up, my son!!!
... there is sun above, even the 2nd-hand light (from the moon) will make your lonely night peace, cool and more enjoyable...
Life's journey is blessed with joy when you opens your eyes, mind and heart...
For "strange" reasons, I don't, you don't...
Life's journey is such a repetition to itself: the joy, the pain, the pain after joy, the joy after pain...
My son, I will pour my heart-out, if only you can raise your head, and look up...
*****
The growing pain, is still a pain.
I pray that your heart is guarded by our angel, so that you will never lose sight, never give-up, never let it go...
I search in the earthly wisdom, and earthly demograph, to find what u lack, ...
I want you to be equiped with the essence to be a happy man.
Search me, a humble helpless man...
... "Who is my rock in this world, besides YOU???!!!"
"Who is my comfort in this world, besides you???"
"Who is my refuge in this world, besides you???"
I BLESS YOU!
"You're my son, ... You're my blood, you are the me in you..."
I will be lived through you... because I fed you, emotionally, spiritually and intellectually. On your forehead it stamps my seal forever...
