Journal

Today I had watched the Talkies Interview that interviewee is "my man"-- Nic Tse. well, because of his background like other migrants, they had more influenced by the western culture from the language to the personality building up, it's just too nature. Anyway how it is nature, I still felt frustrated, is that because of my pride? well the thing is so.... cannot explain, I reckon maybe I will be so nervous and panic in front of my dream, the words will not be smooth~~!!! for sure~!!! and how short my english words are that it's so shamed to be~!!!

recently, dont want to be interacted with her. I jumped into a trash that I cannot help myself out from the delimma reluctance. Who can I believe? J or R? I knew that R said that words when we just started the relationship, but it's too long time ago. What the way she deals with others? keep pretending she is innocent enough and hidding intelligent on that everything she knows? so fake on my face to see this acting and performance.

Uncle, do you know how much I miss you and need you standing here beside me to give me encourage and brave?!!! are you the one I cannot give up for my lifetime or move on to the next relationship with another guy? Who can pay me the happiness that I am wondering?

Well never mind, I can pay it for myself like i always said, I can buy me a dinner and drink without a loser guys.