上帝得不到终生职位

16个原因：上帝得不到大学里的终生职位

1： 因为他总共只发表了一部著作 （注：圣经）
2： 而且是用希伯来语写的 （注：语言不通用）
3： 著作没有任何索引
4： 也没有发表在指定的期刊
5： 人们甚至怀疑这著作是不是他写的
6： 即使是他真的创造了这个世界，除此之外，他还作了什么？
7： 他和别人的合作太有限
8： 科学界感到很难重复他的实验结果 （注：创世纪，天，地，人 ... ）
9： 他从不申请获得批准，就用人来做实验
10： 当一个实验做坏了，他就把他们都淹死来掩盖失败的实验结果 （注： 上帝创造了人后，人们不听他的，开始反叛，腐败，上帝就发洪水把所有人和动物都淹死，只有躲在诺亚方舟里的才活了下来）
11： 当实验对象没有按他想象的来表现，他就惩罚他们，或把他们从实验中去除 （注： 上帝经常惩罚不听他的，且经常把他们处死，上千人的处死。 实验纪录要客观属实，不能凭主观来只挑选好的结果， 而去掉不好的结果）
12： 他从不来到课堂，只让学生们自己去读那本书
13： 他让他的儿子来替他教课 （注： 指耶稣）
14： 他把他最早的两名学生开除并赶出校园，因为他们学得太多了 （注： 亚当夏娃偷吃了果， 因而知道了很多.... 上帝把他们逐出伊甸园）
15： 虽然他只有十项要求， 但绝大多数学生都不能通过考试 （注： 指上帝的10 commandmants。 他曾被列入美国的宪法，直至大概在20世纪中。 多数人都无法遵从所有这10条。 我把这10条列在本页最后)
16: 他坐办公时间太少, 和学生见面的地点都是在山顶上 (注: 上帝总共出现过几次,都是在山顶上, 一般人遇不到看不到)

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16 reasons why God can’t get tenure at a University or published in peer reviewed journals.

1. Because he has only one major publication
2. And it was in Hebrew
3. And it had no references
4. And it was not published in a refereed journal
5. And some even doubted that He wrote it himself
6. It may be true that He created the world, but what has he done since?
7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited
8. The scientific community has had a very rough time trying to replicate his results
9. He never applied to the Ethics Board for permission to use human subjects
10. When one experiment went awry, he tried to cover it up by drowning the subjects
11. When subjects didn’t behave as predicted, He often punished them, or just deleted them from the sample
12. He rarely came to class; He just told students to read the book
13. He has His son teach the class
14. He expelled His first two students for learning too much
15. Although there were only 10 requirements, most students failed His tests
16. His office hours were infrequent, and usually held on a mountaintop.

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10 commandments:
I am the Lord your God
Thou shalt have no other gods before me
Thou shalt not make for thyself an idol
Thou shalt not make wrongful use of the name of thy God
Remember the Sabbath and keep it holy (星期六, 不准做任何工作)
Honor thy Mother and Father
Thou shalt not murder
Thou shalt not commit adultery
Thou shalt not steal
Thou shalt not bear false witness
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house.