大家都来砸：看看我是追求上进，还是脑袋错乱？I am 40 yrs.

国内高校教师都美国博士，喜欢自由支配时间和少见人。工作后，因为先生也在一个小镇的大学作faculty, due to duel career family conflict, 我没有在同一年也找到faculty position, 也不愿 到１００ miles 之外的大学早。于是加入staff.

因为机遇加上好的英文和工作能力，我很快生到了到高级经理级，和校长，系主任级打交道。以后有可能再升，也可能就这样，毕竟作纯administrator 的外国人太少。

Please allow me to type in English -- too slow with my Chinese software.

I am absolutely in a good position now: supervise 4 full-timers, salary is higher than most of assistant professors in my field (social science), never short of money to buy work-related things, can travel to anywhere and stay in best hotels, only report to a reasonable boss, etc. However, finally, ,there is a faculty position in my field (social science) in this university. I wanted to apply and have a good feeling to get it due to my publications and teaching and service records.

I think deep down I have a faculty dream. The reason is two fold. First, I am damn good at publishing. I published in all tier A and B journals in my field, and I still publish 2-3 papers each year even it is not expected in my current position. Second, I still like flexible work hours. Now, I can be flexible, but don\'t want to set bad examples for my staff.

我生生说我是身在福中不知福。If I get the position and take it, very likely my pay will be cut. I will struggle with things like terrible politics, pressure for grant, short of travel money, multiple supervisors, occasional nasty students, ect. just like every assistant professor. 他唯一的担心是我现在的位置高，谁知道以后consolidate就没有了，不如tenured后的faculty 好。我倒不担心这个，就是从事和准备了faculty这么久，终于看到一个机会似的。

请各位指教和砸砸我， 哈哈。