以前在网上读到一个段子，说一老兄去剑桥参观。到那儿见人就问徐志摩的《再别康桥》石碑在哪儿。因为他来前听人说老徐那首诗被剑桥刻在一 石碑上了。总算问到一个小店里的英国小伙子，倒是知道有这么一首诗，什么“Softly, softly, I leave。”把那老兄惊得差点一斤头跌进康河里。。。。。。
诗词不可译，这几乎难以否认。
那天我闲来乱翻书，正好翻到杨宪益和戴乃迭翻译的《The Dream of Red Mansions》，里面的《好了歌》是这么翻译的：
好了歌 All Good Things Must End
世人都晓神仙好， All men long to be immortals,
惟有功名忘不了! Yet to riches and rank each aspires;
古今将相在何方， The great ones of old, where are they now?
荒冢一堆草没了。 Their graves are a mass of briars.
世人都晓神仙好， All men long to be immortals,
只有金银忘不了！ Yet silver and gold they prize
终朝只恨聚无多， And grub for money all their lives,
及到多时眼闭了。 Till death seals up their eyes.
世人都晓神仙好， All men long to be immortals,
只有姣妻忘不了！ Yet dote on the wives they’ve wed,
君生日日说恩情， Who swear to their husband evermore
君死又随人去了。 But remarry as soon as he’s dead.
世人都晓神仙好， All men long to be immortals,
只有儿孙忘不了！ Yet with getting sons won’t have done,
痴心父母古来多， Although fond parents are legion,
孝顺儿孙谁见了？ Who ever saw a really filial son?
粗粗一看，觉得两个比较明显的问题。“神仙”的含义远不止“immortals”，大略可以说还包含四段歌词里大家“忘不了”的那些劳什子被不消一顾后的心境等等。从前后文看，后者是主要的。估计英文里没有对等词，可能必须音译，就叫“shenxian”，然后脚注。
《好了歌》就是“好”和“了”两字在那里起始和终结，不仅为音律，而且为宗旨。杨译没顾上这个，否则要重新译过。
哪“好”和“了”两字如何处理？
于是，又去看英国牛津学者霍克斯和他女婿翻译的《The Story of the Stone》，里面的《好了歌》是这么翻译的：
好了歌 Won-Done Song
世人都晓神仙好， Men all know that salvation should be won.
惟有功名忘不了! But with ambition won’t have done, have done.
古今将相在何方， Where are the famous ones of days gone by?
荒冢一堆草没了。 In grassy graves they lie now, every one.
世人都晓神仙好， Men all know that salvation should be won.
只有金银忘不了！ But with their riches won’t have done, have done.
终朝只恨聚无多， Each day they grumble they’ve not made enough.
及到多时眼闭了。 When they’ve enough, it’s goodnight every one!
世人都晓神仙好， Men all know that salvation should be won.
只有姣妻忘不了！ But with their loving wives won’t have done.
君生日日说恩情， The dalings every day protest their love:
君死又随人去了。 But once you’re dead, they’re off with another one.
世人都晓神仙好， Men all know that salvation should be won.
只有儿孙忘不了！ But with their children won’t have done, have done.
痴心父母古来多， Yet though of parents fond there is no lack.
孝顺儿孙谁见了？ Of grateful children saw I ne’er a one.
霍译把“神仙”译成基督教的“salvation”，大概为了让英语读者容易明白。不过同样不能传达中文的本意。也应改成音译。
处理“好”和“了”两字看上去译出了点韵味，但仍然差强人意。“好”字相比“了”字，要容易些；“了”字挺难。“忘不了”的“了”字可以处理为英文 的将来完成时否定式；可每一小段最后那个“了”虽然与前面那个共用一字，意思却不同，前三段那个“了”是过去完成时肯定式；最后一句那个“了”是疑问助 词。霍译分别用“done”和“one”来译一个“了”字，这就打了大折扣。可英文哪里又有那么一个词可以代替上述“了”的多种用法呢？况且中文语句和时 态构成方式又有其独特之处。这可能就是不可译例子之一吧。
回想老徐的《再别康桥》被蹩脚英译糟蹋成那样子。我忍俊不住。
