1 An energetic wife精力旺盛的妻子
Neighbor: I heard a big noise in front of your house last night. What happened to you?
Husband: It was nothing. My wife was a bit cross, and threw my overcoat out of the window.
Neighbor: Your overcoat? But how could it make such a noise?
Husband: I… I happened to be inside the coat.
邻居：昨天夜里我听见你家屋前有很大的声音，你们出了什么事吗？
丈夫：没什么。我的妻子有点不高兴，把我的大衣给扔到窗外去了。邻居：你的大衣？扔掉大衣怎么会有那么大的声音？
丈夫：我……我恰好也在大衣里面。
2 Good sight好视力
Lawyer: You say you were about thirty-five feet away from the scene of the accident? Just how far can you see clearly?
Witness: Well, when I wake up in the morning I see the sun, and they tell me it's about ninety-three million miles away.
律师：你说你离事故现场约有35英尺，你能看清多远的东西？
证人：这么说吧，早上起床后我看见太阳，别人告诉我这大约有9300万英里远。
证人：这么说吧，早上起床后我看见太阳，别人告诉我这大约有9300万英里远。
3 Who's better satisfied? 谁更满足？
Who's better satisfied? A person with six children or a person with $6 million? Why?
The person with six children of course. Because the one with $6 million wants more.
一个有六个孩子的人和一个有600万美元的人，谁更满足？为什么？
当然是有六个孩子的那个，因为有600万美元那个还想要得更多。
4 Marry Him嫁给他
Jane loved Tony, but she worried about all the money he squandered when they went out together. “How can I stop Tony spending so much money on me?” She asked her mother.
“Marry him!”
简很爱托尼，但是当他们一起出去的时候，托尼总是大手大脚地花钱，这使简感到很不安。“我怎样才能不让托尼在我身上花那么多钱呢？”她问自已的母亲。
“嫁给他！”
5 Hen's Legs母鸡的腿
Son: Why are hen's legs so short?
Dad: You're a fool. If the hen's legs were too long, wouldn't they drop their eggs into pieces when laying?
儿子：为什么母鸡的腿这么短呢？
父亲：你真笨。如果母鸡的腿太长，它们下蛋的时候，鸡蛋岂不都摔碎了？
6 Two chickens两只鸡
Uncle Silas had lighted his pipe for a comfortable smoke，when Aunt Mary looked up from her knitting and said：“Silas，do you know that Sunday next will be the thirtieth anniversary of our wedding？”
“I swan，”said Silas，“is that so，and what about it？”
“Oh，nothing，”said Aunt Mary，“Only thought maybe we ought to kill them two Rhode Island Red chickens.”
“But，Mary，”said Uncle Silas，“How can you blame them two Rhode Island Red chickens for what happened thirty years ago？”
赛拉斯大叔点燃了烟斗想好好吸一口，玛丽大妈织着毛衣抬眼说：“赛拉斯，你知不知道下星期日是我们结婚三十周年？”
“老天哪，”赛拉斯说，“是吗？那又怎么样？”
“噢，没什么，”玛丽大妈应道，“我只是想，也许我们该把那两只罗得岛红鸡宰了。”
“可是，玛丽，”赛拉斯大叔说，“你怎么能够把三十年前发生的事怪到那两只罗得岛红鸡的头上呢？”
