不知道你家女儿多大了,就得最好就事论事,上升到太高的大道理,有时小孩子没法理解。我儿子是这样的。他会问,“mom, what? what are you talking about?" 我知道他不是装的,他是真的不懂。可能也有语言障碍吧。我说中文。
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I think you chose the wrong time to talk about things. You should talk to her at the time you asked her to fold the clothes, not after. She won't understand why you talked about it afterwards. But no matter what, you should tell her you love her first.
-- It is very helpful for me as a parent. 当孩子伤心、难过、生气的时候,也不会是灌输规则与训诫说教的好时机。 Most of the time (my kids are still very small) when it happens, I am upset too because they did not listen then got them in trouble. I am struggling with my own frustration while trying to comfort them.
There is no manual for being a parent, and each child is different. We are all learning.
穷则思变, if I were in your situation, I am not sure I could do better than you have done. You are doing the most important step - debriefing, trying to figure out what it did not work/did work and what you could do to improve.
Most importantly, I can tell you love your daughter very much. I am sure your daughter knows it too.
I wouldn't be that sensitive if my daughter refused to do something. Not a big deal. I wouldn't try to talk some sense into her when she is emotional, but did it anyway when I was angry. My point is it takes time to grow for both the parents and the children.