车匪路霸的二手故事

史上最健康,不反弹,不忌口的减肥法.
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下面那个车匪路霸帖子满是道听途说,连一点真实信息都没有。缺乏营养。我讲一个亲历者讲给我的故事,转给大家算二手,真实度较高。

我在国内工作时候公司的专职司机讲给我的。司机姓金,我叫他金哥吧。金哥80年代在一家国营厂做司机。厂子生产消防器材,全国经销,所以他送货跑长途经常去广州。估计是外销从广州发货吧。京广一路过道,嘿嘿,必须经过中原某省。

俗话说靠山吃山,靠水吃水。中原大省有的地方大平原没山也没水,国道边的老百姓就靠路吃路。这个金哥跑了多年长途很有经验(教训,跟多是)。所以他跑路不离车队,而且知道哪些地方绝不能停留。

但是人总会有一些猪队友。金哥的故事发生是因为他开始带徒弟。老司机带学徒,这在80年代是规矩。那天金哥车队一路趁夜狂奔,就是打算赶夜路出了某省地界。那里的老乡太机智,不好兑付。可是这个学徒喝多了啤酒,非要走肾。这样金哥的车就落了单。

这倒霉徒弟还不肯在路边方便,非得找村子蹲茅坑。说实在的,国道旁边空气清新,比农村的旱厕可是好多了。金哥考虑半夜老乡都睡了,应该问题不大,就叮嘱徒弟快点。这里不很太平。谁知徒弟好死不死的没跑到茅坑,在一老乡家院子旁边卸货了,大的小的都来了。

狗被惊动了,老乡出来查看,抓个正着。这下有麻烦了。老乡知道自己人单势孤,仗着有理,揪住人大声吵吵。很快村里人都起来了。一看有大生意,全起来了。

金哥毕竟有经验,看出谁是村老大,就跟他说别动粗,我们赔钱,车里有,给你拿。村老大一张嘴就三千。天妈吔,八十年代三千能快北京二环买房了吧?!金哥沉着的讨价还价,一边让徒弟先回驾驶楼等着。村民看见肥羊认怂所以也放松了警惕。

最后说好赔八百,金哥说去车里拿钱。十几个老乡拿着扁担跟着,怕他跑了。

金哥后来说,他最机智的两件事,一是车没熄火,挂档就能跑。二是车里放了两把消防枪防身。等他假装在驾驶楼翻钱,实际是把枪上好了。一回身,对着村老大脸上就一枪。紧接着另一把枪对后面也开了枪。一把消防枪里只有一颗消防弹。但是炸开后是靠干粉灭火。所以等于投放了烟幕弹加催泪弹。老乡都睁不开眼了。呛的直咳。金哥和徒弟猛踩油门,活口脱险。

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