Vaccinated for Covid, Tim returned to BJJ and joined the adults early June.
Over the past year and a half, the teenager had reached 5'7" and put on about
40lbs. The head coach asked jokingly "What did you feed him?" "You mean what
he fed on behind my back?" I replied with resignation. While Tim was on the
mat, I would often read and write on my laptop in the car.
But soon I noticed a lack of passion. Training with the adults, the top dog in
the teenage class must have become the under dog and had to start from the
bottom of the totem pole. Tue afternoon, Tim took a nap after his robotics camp
and again missed his jiu-jitsu class. I was very upset: "I always have tried to
do my bit and I expect you to do the same!" That evening, I did not have supper
with him.
My injury was 95% healed and I decided to wait no more. I had to lead by
example. Wed evening, I put on a gi and joined him on the mat.
I have gained 10 lbs over the past four years and become 50% stronger which
seemed to have armed me with a strange serenity and the confidence that I could
put up a decent resistance against bigger guys. This allowed me to calm down to
think. In sparring, I became less aggressive and began to have fun and enjoy
learning.
I did have great fun rolling with Tim as we tried to trick and submit each other.
Each move was an attempt to advance or defend, just like in chess. My dad
used to play Chinese chess with me. Now I play another form of chess with my
son. It was very satisfying if only to get him out there and move. As he hadn't
warmed up to remote-learning jiu-jitsu, it was a bonus when I could transfer some
of what I learned on my own to him in a gym setup.
Attacks on Asians over the past year made me reflect and decide to train only
for self-defense and pay less attention to belt-levels. From this perspective, I
was able to discern what lessons were useful to me. The extra education from
Henry's online courses also allowed me to be more discriminating. Thank You!
