After I regained my Christian faith in 2006, my "nobel" ambition of being a top scholar lost its meaning to me. I realized the world is developing too fast with advances in science, yet our moral value based on Christianity is not catching up. Over the history, we developed all kinds of technology to make us more comfortable and satisfy our material needs, yet we forget how Christ suffered for us. Perhaps, some natural suffering is to remind us how great God is and how we should stand in awe of his greatness. However, we challenged the nature with all kinds of scientific breakthrough. Some of the research probably went over board, such as consumer behavior scientists understanding the unsconsicous mind, and stem cell research. I do not denounce all scientific research. However, I do think the single purpose of pursuing the law of nature without God's favor is like commiting the original sin of Adam and Eve. The serpant seduced them with "wisdom". They ate the fruit from the tree of knowledge and disobeyed God. Perhaps, for some knowledge it is better not be sought, without full understanding it just may be the thing that destroyes us. I agreatly admired this Jewish German Scientist. When she had the chance to reseach atomic bomb, she refused and declared that I do not want anything to do with a Bomb. I think there should be ethical judgement on scientific research. Some research is not driven by benefiting mankind but pure greed. Afterthat, I lost some passion for doing research, consciously or subconscioulsy. My mind is just no longer excited about exploring "truth".
