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我曾经爱过你
我曾经爱过你
我曾经爱过你:爱情,也许
在我的心灵里还没有完全消亡,
但愿它不会再打扰你,
我也不想再使你难过悲伤。
我曾经默默无语、毫无指望地爱过你,
我既忍受着羞怯,又忍受着嫉妒的折磨,
我曾经那样真诚、那样温柔地爱过你,
但愿上帝保佑你, 另一个人也会象我爱你一样。
1829
戈宝权 译
这首诗是献给安娜 · 阿列克谢耶夫娜 · 奥列尼娜( 1808-1888 )的。奥列尼娜(奶名安涅塔)是美术学院院长、彼得堡公共图书馆馆长、考古学家奥列宁的千金小姐。
奥列尼娜生活在著名学者家中,受到文学艺术的熏陶,文化素质较高,同时又颇多魅力,相当活泼,惹人喜爱。奥列尼娜和普希金接触之后,她曾表白说:普希金是 “ 当时她所见到的最有趣的人 ” ,普希金对她也充满了情意。他们一起在沙龙见面,在郊外同游,在彼得堡夏园幽会。
1828 年夏天,普希金很想和奥列尼娜结为夫妻,但却遭到了她的父亲的拒绝。普希金遭到拒绝后,很快就离开了彼得堡。后来,普希金与奥列尼娜一家关系大大疏远了,其中很重要的原因是她的父亲越来越靠近沙皇,而且这位要人对社会上流传的普希金的讽刺短诗极为不满。
普希金 1828 年的爱情诗,《她的眼睛》、《你和您》、《美人儿啊,不要在我面前唱起》、《豪华的京城,可怜的京城》、《唉,爱情的絮絮谈心》、《我曾爱过你》 …… 都是由奥列尼娜引发出来的。
据奥列尼娜的孙女说, 1833 年普希金在《我曾爱过你》这首原来写在她的祖母纪念册上的诗的下边,用法文加了一句话: “ 这是很久以前的事情了 ” 。
Three English Translations
I loved you once: perhaps that love has yet
To die down thoroughly within my soul;
But let it not dismay you any longer;
I have no wish to cause you any sorrow.
I loved you wordlessly, without a hope,
By shyness tortured, or by jealousy.
I loved you with such tenderness and candor
And pray God grants you to be loved that way again.
I loved you: and, it may be, from my soul
The former love has never gone away,
But let it not recall to you my dole;
I wish not sadden you in any way.
I loved you silently, without hope, fully,
In diffidence, in jealousy, in pain;
I loved you so tenderly and truly,
As let you else be loved by any man.
http://www.poetryloverspage.com/poets/pushkin/pushkin_ind.html
I loved you and my love may still be there,
Deep in my soul remains to stay aglow.
That should not be an object of your care –
I do not want disturb you any more.
I loved you unrequited in still wonder
Through bouts of jealousy and diffidence.
I loved you so sincerely and tender –
God bless you with such love of someone else.
English translation by Dina Belyayeva: