今年读的书比任何时候都多, 同时读几本.
昨晚睡了6个小时, 不到6点起来, 快走了5迈, 然后看完"Wild-from lost to found on the pacific crest trail" 最后2章.
Cheryl Strayed 在妈妈去世不能走出抑郁阴影, 继父再婚不再关心他们, 自己有外遇离婚, 吸毒玩世不恭等经历后开始她的太平洋登山之旅 (pacific crest trail), PCT全长2650迈, 从墨西哥边境到加大拿边境. 她用3个月完成从加洲到渥罗根1100迈的自我发现之旅. 绝大部分旅程她一个人走, 过沙漠爬雪山, 因为没有长途登山经验, 登山前期连登山杖也没买, 行李过重, 登山鞋太小, 3个月登山脚趾甲掉了6个, 很多地方都磨破, 很多时候因为钱不够还挨饿. 但登山的旅程让她发现世界上有很多温情的好人, 独处野外环境和应付生存的困境让她从悲伤痛苦中走出, 尤其是活出跟她妈妈不一样的人生, 她妈妈临终前跟她说过, 她一辈子都是为别人活, 为人妻为人母, 最大的遗憾就是没为自己活过 (这样的话我们在生活中听很多人说过). 她最终发现了自己的人生目标成为畅销书作者.
去年读过"Into the Wild", "the call of the wild" 和 "Endurance: Shackleton's Incredible Voyage", 发现自己对野外探险特别感兴趣(the call of the wild 讲的是狗但人的世界又何不是如此?). 我习惯独处, 喜欢大自然和小小的冒险, 不喜欢复杂的人际关系, 喜欢天文科幻, 很多人生理念也与国内受的教育不符. 有时我想人生到底有没有轮回, 如果有, 我的某个前世是不是探过险是不是在国外生活过. 在广州20来年上海3年心没定过, 97年西欧5国游让我一下子喜欢上西德并盟发了后来移民的念头, 加拿大的生活让我有终于到家的感觉.
我也想出去登山几天, 在野外露营, 我觉得自己适应能力很强, 什么样的苦都可以吃, 可惜家里领导从小和父母camping很多, 现在只肯住好的酒店. 想加入登山俱乐部, 但想想自己上班时间限制不可能跟团员一起经常活动而放弃, 好象什么事都要等退休才能干. 今年我准备有开春后有时间就出去走trail, 把大多地区的都走个遍.
我认为去野外是对身体和心灵的洗礼, 去考验自己的身体和灵魂, 去欣赏城市里看不到的大自然, 看星星看月亮, 去让身体累的爬不起来倒下就可以睡, 啥都不想.......
家长说等我退了就到乡下买房子过off grid 日子, 他说以现在的科技可以过的非常好, 我说好啊, 能养鸡养鸭种菜养花钓鱼真好, 但一定要离买咖啡和吃早餐的地方不太远:)
quotes:
Alone had always felt like an actual place to me, as if it weren't a state of being, but rather a room where I could retreat to be who I really was.
It had to do with how it felt to be in the wild. With what it was like to walk for miles with no reason other than to witness the accumulation of trees and meadows, mountains and deserts, streams and rocks, rivers and grasses, sunrises and sunsets.
I'd finally come to understand what it had been: a yearning for a way out, when actually what I had wanted to find was a way in.
Alone had always felt like an actual place to me, as if it weren't a state of being, but rather a room where I could retreat to be who I really was.
I knew that if I allowed fear to overtake me, my journey was doomed. Fear, to a great extent, is born of a story we tell ourselves, and so I chose to tell myself a different story from the one women are told. I decided I was safe. I was strong. I was brave. Nothing could vanquish me.
