Another beautiful night without you... 10/22

How was your day today?  I imagine you must have been real busy.

I spent the afternoon reading…I've been doing an awful lot of that lately.  Reading, thinking…

It was so good to hear your voice yesterday, I don't have words to tell you how much I miss seeing you, being near you, walking you out at night. Kissing you, holding you. I know all this patience will bare fruit someday…

I don't think I have ever corresponded with someone as much as I have you.  I love writing you; it is such an easy way to share my emotions in a "safe" way.  

I think it is strange that I am so comfortable with you. I have never felt fear of judgment from you, and it is so enigmatic to me. I feel a sense of relief when you and I communicate, like I finally have the ability to express everything about myself to someone.

I have made my mind up that I am going to go back to work after my Colorado trip. I should be leaving on or around the second of November. When I come back, I will go back to my old job temporarily to get some quick money, and I have already sent out my resume to a couple of companies in the semiconductor industry, including the company I left back in 2001.

I have come to the realization that venturing off, hitchhiking around the southwest and Baja may not be the right thing to do right now. Something tells me that it is a journey I am still to make, but as strong as my desire to go was, my gut says I need to do it some other time. I am glad I am driving out to Colorado though.  I think I have become restless…maybe I should get back in school.

Anyway, I'll write more in a little while...

 

Wow...another year for Rebecca! I hope someday I have a chance to know her...I wish her a happy birthday, nonetheless. She is  as beautiful as her mother...and I can tell she will grow up to be a strong, wonderful person like you as well.

When I said you were complicated, I wasn't meaning that as a negative. Most people are just simple, and simple minded. I don't think you fit into that category, and you do have many layers, indeed.

So...did you spend any time with Rebecca today? Is she happy to be a year older?

Can't wait to see the improvements and paint work at the store. Wish I could be there to help...

Anyway, you are in my thoughts and prayers, and I will say a special prayer for Rebecca as well tonight.

I will see you soon, I miss you!

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