请各位网络朋友帮帮我出出主义,该不该回国?

我在大概一年前发过帖子,请各位网络朋友了解我们的现状,帮帮我出出主义。他已经回国一年半了。现在又到了我们作决定的时候了。

我们在美十年,有一对儿子女儿刚上学.老公在我的坚决反对下还是回国。我在一个大学工作, 做着鸡肋一样的工作,收入一般。看样子老公2-3年是不会回美国了。他现在每年可以回美国几次。儿女很喜欢美国。儿子现在钢琴,游泳,滑冰都挺好。每天可高兴。我现在拿不定主义,今年年暑假后,全家都回中国,还是维持现状?维持现状的话,我很辛苦,心里和身体都很疲惫,如果都回去的话,怕对小孩有影响。即使回去,我也计划回去3-4年,等小孩小学毕业后,回美国上初中,毕竟他们要在美国读大学。就担心这样换环境,对小孩有影响。请朋友们给我建议!!!!!多谢!

我家情况是我先生极力回国,在我的再三阻拦下仍然回去了,扔下我们母女三人在美国。我全职工作10years,种种原因,现在搞的我焦头烂额,非常影响我们的感情。我现在都非常恨他。恨他的不负责任。我在美国申请公民,公民马上就下来。问题是现在我是身心疲惫,我害怕耽误两个小孩的前途。是跟他离婚还能怎么办? 我都不知道怎么办好。请各位兄弟姐妹帮我出出主意。

我们前几天通话时他透露出孩子还是在美国好,他2-3个月回来一次。暑假我和孩子回国,这样我们全年在一起的时间也有5个月。还说我们回去的话,他要分心,不能更全心投入到他的事业中。但我不同意。他说你不同意就算了。其实他回去半年了,在这半年前,他都买好机票要回去看看,在机票前一天晚上我对他说,如果你回去,丢掉现在这么好的工作,我没法和你过了。他就没回去,机票作废。第二天,自己一人在家痛哭,觉得自己的事业,前程被我和孩子困住,心里很不甘心,想回国创一番大事的野心成了泡影。后来在朋友的劝说下(我们所有的朋友都说他不应该回),他也想开了。但国内的人又和他联系上,说让他回去看看,如果不喜欢就回来,这样我暑假前脚回国,他后脚也回去了,回去之后他就不想回来了,在国内又和我商量,我还是坚决反对, 包括我的家人。但他家人整天想他回去,都想粘他的光。但他主意已定,自己说,舍不得孩子套不住狼,这样他就把我们舍掉,回去自己创去了。我们结婚整十一年,头5年他读书,我工作(我是国内的博士,来美国就工作),我办绿卡等,他一切事情都听我的,但最近3,4年,他工作后,和我的意见分歧的比较多,我们两地分居,周末我带孩子到他那里(我们在他工作地买了房子,想我以后要到他那里的)。对他回国这件事,我心里始终不同意,其实已经严重影响了我对他的感情。我想即使我们全家都回去后,遇到不开心的事情,我都要怪到他的头上。其实我心里最担心的是3-4年后,他还是不想回美国的话,我拿他是一点办法都没有的。那时我年纪也大了,回美也不好找工作,我实在是怕耽误孩子的身心和前程。我真是很矛盾。唉!遇到这样的老公。。。

very appreciate for XDJM\'s idea. Right now my husband think at his age, it is the only chance that he can get to develep his career. He has a decent job in America, but he doesn\'t like. He likes social, drink alcohol, make more friends, don\'t like america\'s boring life, and just as a senior engineer. So he decided to xi sheng short family\'s life to gain his longer happy life. And ask me to stay in america for one year to get citizen for after 5 years, we will back to america, let my kids go to middle school. You know it is hard for me to take care of 2 kids with full time job. I didn\'t expect it is so difficult. In america, we live apart around 70 miles, and I take care of 2 kids, and we bought a house nearby his job because I think I will move within one year, and every weekend I will take my 2 kids driving to our house. He doesn\'t like and always angry to me that I don\'t move. right now, he went away. I always ask him what is your happy life? kids without father? wife without husband? and recently I met a lot of trouble: car, personl, job, kids\'s day care... all these trouble made me crazy!!!!!!!!!!!!

I like live america and my kids like too. He doesn\'t like USA when he come. He came to usa for his phD, just earn money in recent 4 years, and I work here since I came, and easily and quickly to get GC.We also have a new big house. if we moved back to china, we will sell our new furnitures and whole staff in house which is just 2 years old. will lose a lot of money. That is what I don\'t like.and feeling is not good, but if don\'t move, it is hard for me...............that\'s why I I need your suggestion. Thank you guys again!!!!!

冈拉梅朵 发表评论于
婚姻是与要双方必要时做出妥协的,如果大家都一位的坚持,最后的结果可想而知。如果你觉得你老公是一位值得爱的人,那么你应该以你们的感情为第一位。孩子的前途固然重要,但世上没有十全十美的事情,所以你只能退而求其次。但愿别像我们国内的妻子一但有了孩子就把夫妻的淡化了,把大部分精力用到孩子身上。毕竟你们是要终老一生的。
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