Chocolate, love, men
A rainy evening, I am alone in the room, but not lonely. With a novel in my hand, chocolate truffles on a plate, solitude could be a joyful experience.
Chocolate has had the reputation of being an aphrodisiac for centuries. Chocolate truffle is first created by a Frenchman in the late 19th century. It is made of a mixing melted chocolate, cream and butter with cocoa powder sprinkled on the outside. An exquisite taste it is, first being the bitterly savored cocoa with its singular aroma, then the full-blown sweetness of melted chocolate. The entire experience is so melancholy and romantic. The only regret is that, forgive my ungratefulness, it’s a gift from a close family member, not an intended lover.
My best friend is a chocolate connoisseur. She always knows the places to get the best chocolate in the city. I sometimes wonder if she discovered them serendipitously or actually did serious research on it. The most amazing part of it is she constantly eats her chocolate but never gets fat nor cursed with bad skin. The only jealousy I sense in myself aside from knowing that the men I loved are in love with someone else is to see her sitting there licking chocolate off her finger, looking very very slim. A blessed woman she is.
I, on the other hand, humbly put, am not so blessed. The last man I was with was harassed with a classic question: Do you think I am fat? I just had one chocolate truffle and we were in bed, so to serve his best interest, he could have lied. But he surprised me with an answer such as: you are maybe a little chubby, being healthy is most important. Interestingly I was not offended as I usually would be. Probably it’s because I learnt not to care. Or maybe it’s just a phase, you know, to live with abandonment for a while. So going to gym is still not on my 2010 new year to do list.
For the longest time I was in a depressive state because of him. I was told by my friends that I must not think of him any longer, just forget about him. It’s true. Why would this time be different…maybe it’s because I was not the one who ended the affair. People say men are fickle and they hold themselves proud because of their numerous sexual conquers. Is it any different for women? Women too, like men, flighty and wondrous, ready to go with the next man who shows a new exciting adventure. So let’s be American about it. When a man stops loving you, you should stop being angry and sad, and just leave, gracefully and wisely. It is easily said than done.
For a person who lives to eat, like myself, this poem hits me like a bullet.
By Gilbert and Sullivan (Trial by Jury)
Consider the moral I pray,
Nor bring a young fellow to sorrow,
Who loves this young lady today,
And loves that young lady tomorrow.
You cannot eat breakfast all day,
Nor is it an act of a sinner,
When breakfast is taken away,
To turn your attention to dinner;
And it’s not in the range of belief,
That you would hold him as a glutton,
Who, when he is tired of beef,
Determines to tackle the mutton.
