A Marriage Challenge
By John R. Buri, Ph.D.
Created Apr 27 2010 - 8:06am
It is wedding time again. On Saturday we went to our 2nd wedding of the season.
I love weddings.
Seeing the wedding couple filled with joy and enthusiasm, it is a day on which nearly everyone in attendance thinks about what marriage is meant to hold for us.
Witnessing the wedding couple being so attentive to each other’s needs and wants reminds each guest once again of how we are meant to live out our marriage vows.
Observing the wedding couple so kind, considerate, and loving toward each serves as a refresher—this is what marriage is supposed to be.
I am frequently puzzled by the fact that so many people marry for love and then we don’t end up doing that for which we married. Why marry for love and then not?
The first dance for the new couple at the reception on this past Saturday is one that I enjoy:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vJ3xTjvj9tw
During this first dance I found myself thinking about how many couples on their wedding day feel this way—You Are The Best Thing That Ever Happened To Me.
My guess is that many couples feel this way on their wedding day. I know I did.
The challenge is to sustain that reality.
Within 3 years of our wedding day, our marriage had become as stale and moldy as an old loaf of bread. How could we have gone from “You Are The Best Thing That Ever Happened To Me” to “Stale And Moldy” in just 3 short years?
The answer is not rocket science.
When you lack joy and enthusiasm for (and with) your spouse….
When you are no longer attentive to one another’s needs and wants….
When you are no longer kind, considerate, and loving toward each other….
I found myself hoping (and praying) for this couple during the first dance. “May the words of this song be as true for you many years from now as it is today. May you continue to show joy and enthusiasm for (and with) your spouse. May you continue to be attentive to one another's needs and wants. May you be kind, considerate,and loving toward each other."
It has been many years now since that "stale and moldy" time in our marriage. It is amazing what joy, attentiveness, and kindness can do.
My wife is The Best Thing That Ever Happened To Me!
I love weddings.
Seeing the wedding couple filled with joy and enthusiasm, it is a day on which nearly everyone in attendance thinks about what marriage is meant to hold for us.
Witnessing the wedding couple being so attentive to each other’s needs and wants reminds each guest once again of how we are meant to live out our marriage vows.
Observing the wedding couple so kind, considerate, and loving toward each serves as a refresher—this is what marriage is supposed to be.
I am frequently puzzled by the fact that so many people marry for love and then we don’t end up doing that for which we married. Why marry for love and then not?
The first dance for the new couple at the reception on this past Saturday is one that I enjoy:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vJ3xTjvj9tw
During this first dance I found myself thinking about how many couples on their wedding day feel this way—You Are The Best Thing That Ever Happened To Me.
My guess is that many couples feel this way on their wedding day. I know I did.
The challenge is to sustain that reality.
Within 3 years of our wedding day, our marriage had become as stale and moldy as an old loaf of bread. How could we have gone from “You Are The Best Thing That Ever Happened To Me” to “Stale And Moldy” in just 3 short years?
The answer is not rocket science.
When you lack joy and enthusiasm for (and with) your spouse….
When you are no longer attentive to one another’s needs and wants….
When you are no longer kind, considerate, and loving toward each other….
I found myself hoping (and praying) for this couple during the first dance. “May the words of this song be as true for you many years from now as it is today. May you continue to show joy and enthusiasm for (and with) your spouse. May you continue to be attentive to one another's needs and wants. May you be kind, considerate,and loving toward each other."
It has been many years now since that "stale and moldy" time in our marriage. It is amazing what joy, attentiveness, and kindness can do.
My wife is The Best Thing That Ever Happened To Me!
