一天下午,到一preschool。一进门就感觉气氛不对。任课老师非常强势。当然这是个special 教室。六个小孩是不愿听话的主,会按自己的高兴和不高兴处理问题。但由于此老师过度认真和压力,非让每一个小孩,每一件事都要exact 照她的方法去做。理论学的不错。还拉着死驴脸。这在正常班沒准行的通,只要你能凶到位。可这是emotional disabilities 班。几个小孩子又哭,又叫,又喊,又打,完全失控,弄得一个老师三个助教在教室里完全崩溃。疲于救火。一会这个躺地上,一会儿那个打小孩。进去两分钟我已像过了两年。而且此教师甚至连三个助教也当小朋友一样对待。一会让这个拿这个玩具给她,一会儿指责那个没把小孩看好,让她打人。一会这,一会那。整个一个控制狂,还一脸死样,只对小孩瞎显耐心。对三个助教严声厉色。我心想,难怪county让我来,之前告我紧急求助,三个助教请辞两个,唯一一个还是老印。这两个sub 一个泰裔,一个巴裔。我明白了,老美怎能忍受这罪。小孩就算了,工作吗,有难,有易。可这控制狂老师态度对成人,恐怕早说no thank you 了。这个棘手的问题交给我,什么意思? 昰党信任我,还是有意想整死我? 让我交不了差,无功而返奚落我。不行,老美鬼子太狡猾,让我想想怎么破这死局。快想,咋办。你那么多聪明才智上哪去了? 哦,妈咪妈咪,㞫麻开门! 有了,先从小孩开始,在之后三十分钟内,使出全身吃奶力气,十八班看家本事都使出了,还外加瑜伽功。总之成了马戏团里的大活宝,跳,唱,说,闹整个一个疯子。就差这是教室而不昰精神病院。一会儿说这个小孩聪明,一会儿那个sweet,一会这个比我强,一会那个you can do better jobs! 都是些无限夸张,哄骗之词。但同时对那种本人认为他们不该做的是,立刻制止但不生气。只一句No thank you! 然后直接point 到那我想要他们去的地方,说do something better, find a good stuff to play. I will help you if you can not. You can do it I knew you can. 过了半小时后,除了一个相对更Stubborn 的软硬不吃的小东西躺在地上耍赖之外,其它开始开心地去做几个成人想让他们做的事了。只见他们换着方式托着,挟着那小毛孩让他站起来,不过还是小死猪一头。哈,敌人抵抗还不昰很顽强,大部分山头己拿下,只差个个击破了。看我的。一个箭步冲上前去,大家都让开,小心受伤,看我的! 对着这小屁孩就斩钉截铁地说,Get up by your own feet, we will not hurt ourselves to pull you up, you have two choices, one,get up and do a thing you like playing toys, reading books, whatever, but if you lay on the ground, fine for us, but you will do nothing but on the ground. Do nothing, I can promise you, unless you chose the first chose at least you can have something you like. If I were you, I will chose the first option for sure. I will count on five, you make your own choice. I knew you are a smart boy, you already knew what you are going to do. 1.2.3.4.还没等到五,人家已经跳起来了。之后整个教室大局已撑控在成人手里。我正乐可以喘口气,聊点轻松的事呢,太压力对大人,小孩都不好。就和几个助教聊了几句家长。因那死脸老师假正经,不理她。可还不到两句,就传来Mrs. could you talk something related to our kids please, thank you! 我当时差点没崩溃。无意识达了一句sorry, not any more. 然后那个气啊,恨不得过去扇她一耳光,你把老娘当你下属还是你这帮小孩了。老子问几句家长话犯哪条门规,教规了,有哪个学校校规说,教师不可以互相交流私人感情的? 我这不没有功労还该有苦労来着。就算聊几句话当我辛勤劳动的报酬总该的吧!你这控制狂,工作狂。装什么英雄好汉,你能,怎么county 还搬我这个救兵来这。整个一个活寡妇,老妖婆,死去吧! 但一想,不对,这是人家地盘,我人单力簿,正面冲突只有吃亏。不行,敢紧撤,惹不起还躲不起吗? 随机起身说到,My time is up, thank you every one gave me a great chance to meet you and those wonderful kids, bye. Have a Great day! 然后特地给那死婆一个假拥抱,其他几个都是亚裔免了。人家不一定喜欢。出门遇到另一个preschool 老师问,Have a good day?答,wonderful except someone treated me like kid, but I still have a great day and the teacher is good but bossy, never mind, I was happy here for you! 之后一想,不能这么就算了,不能受这种待遇。于是直奔office。到那,问,怎样? 你喜欢小朋友吗? 答,小朋友很好,但大朋友treated me like one of her kids. I felt like she was pushing me around,I hope she was not on purpose, otherwise I will be very sad. 哦我会考虑vote for her to be 系统的最佳老师后选人next school year! 你说她能选上吗? Really? Definitely she would not meant to bossy you around ? 答,Hope she has answer for you or me! 说完再见就开拔了。她玩阴的,我以其人之道还以其身。这么不respect adults 的人,难怪老美全跑光,只剩几个受气包亚裔。真为她们悲哀,一点反抗意识和能力都没有。至少本人要办公室知道此人霸道,不喜欢她。这就够了。下次就算她知道我背后骂她也无妨,我很给她面子,但至少让她知道我也尊重她,和她一样阴坏。从这例说明,每个人都有权说No thank you 但还是要分场合。对小孩或你尊敬或认识的人可以这么说,没问题,每个人都有自己的生活和选择做事的方式,但有时,别人对你不尊敬时,正面冲突万万不可,可能釆用隐敝的方式更能保护自己,还可以打击敌人。让你的敌人知道,你是个有涵养的人,至少给对方留面子。所以,如有不能回避的理由斗争学校,千万要有方式方法,省得让别人小看了你。对待孩子要有家长limits。不能让他们把家长push around,you must 坚持最起码的原则,突破底线,必须no means no, no matter they said or they did what, still the answer is no. 决不馁协。否则后果不堪设想。如孩子小时候家长lost control 以后,将来长大后患无穷。因为他们会经常突破底线,提出各种无礼要求。稍大后,就会养成习惯性控制欲。那时就比较难改变了。而且后果也会比较难弥补。还是剩找到合理的,适合自己孩子和家庭的门规吧。这点,那死脸老师很成功。可惜对十八以上不灵,别人会回她no thank you!And leave her alone and nobody likes around her anymore。她的工作会越来越难做。另外一定要坚信孩子可以做得更好,经常鼓励you can do it, you can do better, you will do better 之类上进之语代替I am disappointed on you, I am mad at you 等情绪词。因为nobody likes it 。这点非常重要。