今天容我偷懒一下下吧。。。很久以前翻译的一篇文章，原文在这里http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationships/are-you-ready-marriage
Are You Ready for Marriage?
你预备好进入婚姻了吗？
By
9 ways to prepare for marriagewhile you’re still single
Often, in the pursuit of love,we get so caught up trying to find the right person, that we end up losingourselves.
But just as important as it isto find someone who has the qualities we want, it’s important to take some timeto look inward, making sure that we are meeting the very standards we arelooking for in a
After all, if you're going tohave a "list" of qualities you want in a partner, then you shouldalso have a corresponding list of qualities you want to exhibit. It seemsobvious, but too often, we hold higher expectations for a potential spouse thanfor ourselves.
So what does it take to become"marriage material"?
那么，怎么才能让自己成为“适婚的对象”呢？
Here are a few characteristicsto consider. Obviously, these are qualities we should continue to strive forlong after we're married—and it's not like we'll master them 100 percent of thetime—but the process starts now, as we ask God to shape us into who He wants usto be.
1.
There is nothing more vital tothe lifeline of a healthy person than being rooted in relationship with Jesus.Through this relationship, we learn what it means to really love, and we areenabled to pour that same kind of love into our romantic relationships, aswell.
Don’t ever neglect your faiththrough the process of dating, because it’s the most important aspect toachieving a rich and meaningful love life.
2. Take Time to Look Inward
The only way to know
Self-awareness is such a crucial aspect to being ready for a healthy andlong-lasting relationship, because you are 50 percent of your futurerelationship. Knowing your strengths, your weakness, your struggles, yourtalents and your flaws has everything to do with the health of your futurerelationship—because healthy people attract healthy relationships.正确的自我认知是一段健康和长远的关系的关键，因为你是两人关系中的一员。知道你的强处，软弱，你的挣扎，能力和弱点决定了你未来的两性关系的健康程度——因为健康的关系来自身心健康的人。
Become “marriage material” by taking the time to look inward. Deal withyour baggage, and strive to become the best version of yourself.
3. Deal With Your Insecurities
It is said that a person’s level of security and confidence is actuallymore attractive to the opposite sex than their physical appearance. A person ofconfidence knows their value is not rooted in their relationship status, butrather, their identity in Christ. People of confidence are enabled to love outof their desire to give, rather than simply out of their desire to get.
4. Work on Growing in Integrity
Honesty, loyalty, respect, purity—living a life of integrity means weresolve to develop the qualities of godliness in our lives.
Integrity is something that begins long before we’ve entered arelationship, and it has everything to do with how we act and interact with thepeople God has placed in our lives here and now.
5. Take Responsibility for Your Life
From how you deal with your finances to how well you keep your word—andeverything in-between—being ready for marriage means you take responsibility for your life.
To put it simply, part of getting ready for marriage means growing up.And “growing up” has nothing to do with your age. It’s one thing to keep achildlike sense of wonder and adventure, but we live in a culture that allowsus to remain children for far too long, never asking us to plan ahead or setgoals, blaming everyone else instead of owning up to our life choices andresponsibilities.简单说来，预备好进入婚姻意味着心智的长大与成熟。而这与年龄无关。保持冒险的童心是一回事，但往往我们的社会过于纵容我们的孩子气，从未要求我们未雨绸缪或设立目标，在我们的人生抉择和责任上没有主人翁的精神反而动则把责任归咎于别人。
Recognize your role in your life and in your relationships by learningto grow up and take action. When you are responsible with your life, you willalso be responsible with your spouse’s heart.
6. Learn to Commit
We live in a generation that’s frequently afraid of commitment.From
Take a look at your life and ask yourself this: what has been your trackrecord when it comes to the area of commitment? What fears, insecurities andanxieties have been holding you back from living your life and makingcommitments? To become ready for marriage, it’s important to be a person that’sdriven by faith, not by fear.
7. Develop Significant Friendships 建立深厚的友谊
A person who is marriage material recognizes that there is so much valuein relationships—above and beyond romantic ones. Healthy people have learned theart of making deep friendships, learning from wise mentors and discipling thosewho are in need of direction.
One way to know how someone will engage in a romantic relationship is bytaking a look at how they interact with the people in their lives.
Are your significant relationships marked by drama and conflict or by communicationand respect? Work on nourishing the relationships that God has given you hereand now in order to prepare yourself for life-long love.
8. Build Healthy Habits
Believe it or not, all the things you struggle with as a single, youwill likely continue to struggle with in your marriage. So there’s no bettertime to better yourself than before marriage.
God’s word reminds us that one of the fruits of the Spirit isself-control. What are the areas of your life that are in need of someself-control? Your spending habits? Your emotional world? Your sexualstruggles? Your leisure activities? How are you spending the precious minutesof your life, and are you building habits that will benefit your futuremarriage or hang-ups that will poison it?
9. Learn to Communicate in Healthy Ways
The truth is, marriage is a life-long conversation. But so many of us gointo it without any knowledge of how to converse or manage conflict. We holdour feelings in, give the cold shoulder or spew
But learning how to communicate in a healthy way is essential for allareas of life, especially marriage. What is your communication bent? Are you apassive, aggressive or assertive communicator? Are you superficial in yourconversation, or do you have the skills to go deep?
Here’s the thing about having a healthy marriage: It starts long beforethe marriage begins.
As you're thinking through the high standards you have for a potentialspouse, take inventory of your life and ask yourself if you’re learning andgrowing in the qualities you have on your "list." Ask God to grow andmature you in faith and other areas, regardless of your relationship status.
材料：绿豆一袋 450g，海带 100g ，红糖50g
做法： 1. 绿豆提前泡好，加水煮开后小火煮40分钟
