Worry prods us to attend to unresolved problems and prevents us from becoming irresponsible person. It is also a major source of human unhappiness. It robs us of sleep and blissful joy. It makes life heavy and us sullen.
Worry is a crisis that often comes from the accumulation of tasks that have not been properly attended to and resolved.
3 factors contribute to worry:
- fear
- wrong beliefs
- ineffective problem-solving skills
Fear
I have not found the way to overcome fear yet. The ways I have tried that are useful sometimes are:
- pray to God and ask help or deliverence
- face it and go through it
- avoid it by distractions
- deny it by positive affirmations
- talk about it with family members
Usually facing it and getting over it will make me feel good in the long run and talking with people is the most ineffective way for me.
Wrong beliefs
I sufferred a lot from my own unwholesome philosophy of life. I realized the importance of core beliefs and values in our health and happiness. I can't tell anyone what is right belief but myself. Nietzsche advocates to adopt a philosophy that works for you - make your life more pleasant, more productive, more creative, more congluent with your own nature. My criteria is simple- if a belief makes me feel good, look good and do good, it is good for me now. I use very objective measures to assess the quality of my life:
- financial abundance
- emotional state
- quality of sleep
- energy level
- the frequency and intense of ?conflicts
- the progress on consiciousness and self-control
- inner peace
If any particular belief contributes positively to all of above, I enbrace it and make it habit. If any one causes tension or suffering in all of above, I try my best to get rid of it . For example, I once believed "exercise is a self-torture before a disease tortures you". That wrong belief cost me dearly. I changed that view in 2014 and benefit significantly from daily physical exercises.
Problem-solving skills
- clarify your objectives and know your priority: avoid doing acts that go against our principles or values. Write down our priorities in life. Give adequate time to each of core values. Set goals and action plans for long, medium and short terms.
- evaluate alternatives and resolve conflicts by brainstorming or meditating depend on the nature of the problem you try to solve. If it is a personal problem, you need to eliminate your inner conflicts before you make the choice. If it is a team problem, make sure you have the right allies.
- choose the most viable method and take massive actions: once you make a choice, stick to it until you see result.
- try your best to accomplish the chosen actions: the beginning is tough, the bottleneck is trying but you are unstoppable. (chicksoup is needed when you want to give up)
- accept the consequences whatever they are: you know you are not God and you have no control over others, even yourself.
Normally our subconseicous will cease to worry if it is convinced that we are doing our level best. "You do your best and God will take care of the rest" is my favorite slogan.
Cheer up worriers! Let us transform ourselves from Worriers to Warriors!
