John Alan Lee’s Color Wheel Theory of Love has had a significant impact on Western society, offering a comprehensive framework for understanding the diversity of love. Through this theory, Western culture better appreciates the various forms of love, which are richly expressed in everyday life and cultural representations.
John Alan Lee's "Color Wheel Theory of Love", proposed in 1973, aims to explain the diversity of love and the different ways people express it. This theory categorizes love into six basic types, similar to the colors on a color wheel. These types can blend to form even more variations of love. The theory has transcended cultural boundaries and has had a profound impact on Western society.
The Six Basic Types of Love in the Color Wheel Theory:
- Eros (Romantic Love): This love is based on passion and strong physical attraction, often associated with idealized romantic feelings. In Western culture, particularly in films and literature, Eros-type love is widely portrayed as the ideal form of romance.
- Ludus (Playful Love): Ludus represents a carefree, playful kind of love, focusing on freedom and enjoyment. Casual dating and flings, common in Western dating culture, reflect the Ludus style of love.
- Storge (Friendship-Based Love): This love grows from deep friendship and emotional intimacy, gradually developing into romantic love. It is especially common in long-term relationships in Western society, emphasizing stability and connection.
- Pragma (Practical Love): Pragma is a practical, rational love that involves long-term considerations such as financial stability and social status. This type of love is reflected in relationships that prioritize long-term stability, common in Western marriages that emphasize practicality.
- Mania (Obsessive Love): Mania is characterized by intense dependency and possessiveness. In Western popular culture, such as films and novels, this type of love is often depicted as toxic or unhealthy.
- Agape (Selfless Love): Agape is a completely selfless, altruistic love that focuses on giving rather than receiving. This love is highly valued in Western religious traditions and charitable acts, representing unconditional care and sacrifice for others.
- Psychology and Marriage Counseling: Lee’s Color Wheel Theory of Love offers psychologists and marriage counselors a framework to understand different expressions of love. It helps couples better understand each other’s love styles, improving their relationships.
- Popular Culture: Lee’s love theory is reflected in Western popular culture. Themes of love seen in films, music, and literature often align with the different types, from the passionate Eros to the playful Ludus, and the selfless Agape. These types are widely represented in artistic and media portrayals, shaping societal views of love.
- Academic Research: In sociology and psychology, Lee’s theory provides researchers with a tool to analyze how love is expressed across different cultural contexts. Although originally developed in the West, its universality and adaptability make it applicable in global cultural studies.
Here are examples of films that reflect the different types of love from John Alan Lee's “Color Wheel Theory of Love”:
1. Eros (Romantic Love)
- Film: The Notebook (2004)
Description: This film epitomizes Eros, as it centers on a passionate, idealized love between Noah and Allie. Their intense physical and emotional connection drives the story, and it showcases the longing and desire often associated with this type of love.
- Film: Titanic (1997)
Description: Jack and Rose’s love is a classic example of Eros, filled with youthful passion and intense attraction. Their brief yet powerful romance against the backdrop of tragedy captures the essence of romantic love.
2. Ludus (Playful Love)
- Film: Friends with Benefits (2011)
Description: This movie highlights Ludus, where two friends (Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis) engage in a casual, non-committal relationship. The playful nature of their relationship without serious emotional attachment aligns with this type of love.
- Film: Alfie (2004)
Description: Alfie (played by Jude Law) engages in a series of casual relationships without emotional investment. The film portrays love as a game, which fits the Ludus style.
3. Storge (Friendship-Based Love)
- Film: When Harry Met Sally (1989)
Description: The love between Harry and Sally develops over time from a strong friendship into a romantic relationship, embodying Storge. Their bond is rooted in shared experiences, trust, and familiarity, evolving gradually into love.
- Film: The Fault in Our Stars (2014)
Description: Though this movie contains elements of passion, the deep friendship and emotional support between the main characters (Hazel and Gus) represent Storge. Their love grows out of mutual understanding and care.
4. Pragma (Practical Love)
- Film: The Proposal (2009)
Description: This romantic comedy portrays Pragma, where Margaret (Sandra Bullock) enters a marriage of convenience with Andrew (Ryan Reynolds) for practical reasons, which later develops into true love. It demonstrates how pragmatic decisions can evolve into deeper emotional connections.
- Film: Sense and Sensibility (1995)
Description: The relationship between Elinor Dashwood and Edward Ferrars is a perfect example of Pragma, where practical considerations and rational choices guide their love, rather than impulsive passion.
5. Mania (Obsessive Love)
- Film: Fatal Attraction (1987)
Description: This film is a classic portrayal of Mania, where obsessive and possessive love leads to dangerous behavior. The character of Alex (played by Glenn Close) becomes unhealthily obsessed with Dan (Michael Douglas), leading to destructive consequences.
- Film: Black Swan (2010)
Description: The relationship Nina (Natalie Portman) has with her obsession for perfection in her ballet career and her fixation on her rival Lily exhibits aspects of Mania, where passion and obsession spiral into unhealthy territory.
6. Agape (Selfless, Unconditional Love)
- Film: The Pursuit of Happyness (2006)
Description: The love Chris Gardner (Will Smith) has for his son in this film exemplifies Agape. Despite facing extreme hardship, Chris’s selfless dedication to providing a better life for his son is a powerful example of unconditional, self-sacrificing love.
- Film: It's a Wonderful Life (1946)
Description: George Bailey’s actions throughout the film, putting others’ needs before his own and making personal sacrifices for the benefit of his community and family, reflect Agape. His love is selfless and unconditional, fitting the Agape archetype.
李约翰的“爱情色彩”理论能在西方社会
李约翰的“爱情色彩”理论,即“色彩爱情理论”(Color Wheel Theory of Love),由心理学家约翰·李(John Alan Lee)于1973年提出,旨在解释爱情的多样性以及人们在爱情中表现出的不同倾向。这一理论将爱情划分为六种基本类型,类似于色彩轮中的颜色,这些类型相互交织,可以组合出更多种类的爱。该理论的广泛应用超越了文化和社会界限,在西方社会中同样具有深远影响。爱情色彩理论的基本类型:
- Eros(浪漫之爱): 这是激情和强烈的身体吸引力为基础的爱情,通常与理想化的浪漫感情相联系。西方文化,特别是在影视作品和文学中,广泛表现了Eros式的爱情,这种类型的爱情往往被认为是理想中的浪漫关系。
- Ludus(游戏之爱): Ludus代表了轻松、玩乐式的爱情,重视自由和享乐。西方社会中的约会文化、速配、随意交往的现象可以归为这一类型,体现了Ludus式的爱情理念。
- Storge(友谊之爱): 这种爱情以深厚的友谊和亲密感为基础,逐渐发展为爱情。这在西方社会的长期伴侣关系中尤为常见,强调稳定性和深度连接。
- Pragma(现实之爱): Pragma是理性、实际的爱情,涉及考虑对方的长远价值,例如经济状况、社会地位等。这种类型的爱情在西方的婚姻选择中,特别是注重长期稳定和实用性的人际关系中,也有一定的体现。
- Mania(狂热之爱): Mania是一种极度依恋和占有欲强的爱情类型。它在西方社会的流行文化中,如一些影视剧和小说中,常被描述为有毒的或不健康的爱情关系。
- Agape(无私之爱): 这是一种完全无私、奉献型的爱,重视给予而非索取。这种爱在西方的宗教文化和慈善活动中尤其受到推崇,代表了对他人无条件的关怀和牺牲。
- 心理学与婚姻治疗: 李约翰的“爱情色彩”理论为心理学家和婚姻治疗师提供了一个框架,用于理解不同人对爱情的不同需求和表达方式。这有助于夫妻或伴侣更好地理解彼此的爱情模式,从而改善关系。
- 流行文化: 李的爱情理论在西方流行文化中也有所体现。西方的影视作品、音乐和文学中常见的爱情主题可以与这些类型相对应,从浪漫的Eros到游戏般的Ludus,再到无私的Agape式爱情。这些类型通过艺术和媒体广泛传播,影响了西方社会对爱情的看法和表现方式。
- 学术研究: 在社会学、心理学等学科中,李的理论为研究者提供了一种分析工具,帮助理解爱情在不同文化背景下的表现差异。虽然李的理论最早在西方提出,但它的普遍性和适应性使其在全球范围内的文化研究中得到应用。
H/t:
女性三爱三色:男人懂吗?
Zhiyan-Le,2013-3-14 14:56:25。
讨论无解问题是吸引人的、也是安全的:它能满足悬念需要,因无解而使得不管多么荒唐的答案都不会丢丑、也使得不管多么卓越的答案都难以服人。有说,没有答案的问题不是问题,有答案的问题才是问题。然而,即便世界上从来就没有无解的问题,人们也会创作出许多无解问题。
女性到底想要什么样的爱情?这就是个长期的无解问题。许多人以为,心理学家一定能猜透和深知女人的心思,可现代精神分析心理学开拓人弗洛伊德很坦诚地说过:“有一个从来没有答案的特大问题、有一个我研究女人的灵魂研究了30年也不知道如何回答的问题,那问题就是:一个女人到底想要什么?”美国公共电视台文化节目评论员直截了当地指出,弗洛伊德的精神分析心理学实际上是把女人称为不可知的“黑色大陆”了。
爱情色彩理论的提出
或许爱情是个永恒主题、而女人总是爱情的最佳象征吧,1970年代以来,不少欧美学者试图从不同角度突破弗洛伊德的局限和探视女人的灵魂深处;其中影响最大者之一是西方学者李约翰于1970年代提出的“爱情色彩”理论。根据美国出版资料看,他的理论大致内容是:
实际生活不是单一类型爱情的生活、而是不同类型彼此交错的。这就发生了混合的爱情色彩。譬如,性爱和情爱混合,是紫色,既讲究肉体力量、也讲究游戏责任;性爱和心爱混合,是橙色,使友情和爱情混为一体;情爱和心爱混合,是绿色,使同舟共济的生活充满了忘我牺牲的精神。
爱情有三色。
理想的混合爱情是三种类型均有且均衡,混合形成的爱情色彩是白色。在美术里,红蓝黄三色是基本色,均衡混合为黑色。在李约翰的“爱情色彩”里,那三色爱情混合为白色或黑色,全看爱情生活的节奏,快者为白、慢者为黑,不快不满者为灰色。
附图:根据李约翰“爱情色彩论”绘制的爱情色彩对应表示:
由于个性不同,不同类型混合的爱情也有偏重,或偏于性爱、或偏于情爱、或偏于心爱。譬如:
在以性爱为基础或偏重性爱的混合爱情的生活中,情爱和心爱是从属肉体力量的。那种生活经常充满了血性激情的魅力,但肉体力量强弱对爱情生活的质量有较大影响,因此,如何通过情爱和心爱来补充和维持肉体力量、就成了经常性的课题。
就性爱偏向而言,情爱和心爱两类或是完全笼罩在性爱之下、或是有所外逸;或是彼此隔离、或是彼此交错。那些不同往往使爱情生活非常丰富的同时也充满了许多变数。譬如,两人之间的友情和爱情的冲突或协调,可以允许或不可允许对第三者的友情或爱情的内藏,在很大程度上取决于情爱和心爱对性爱的影响,而那种影响跟年龄和经历又是密切相关的。
爱情色彩的混合。
以上说的,是在某基本爱情色彩之下的其它两类爱情色彩程度完全均衡;然而,实际生活当中,两者的色彩程度不可能完全一样,即不可能是均衡的。那意味着爱情生活的色彩是多种多样的,是因人而异和因时而异的,是不能用一个模型套用到所有人的。
为了更好理解和应用“爱情色彩”论,李约翰和他的证实者和追随者们用历史文化来比喻三个基本爱情色彩和它们的混合:
如图示:
•性爱好比是古希腊时期,爱情生活充满了肉体力量的魅力;
•情爱好比是古罗马时期,爱情生活很讲究游戏的规则责任;
•心爱好比是中世纪时期,爱情生活很依靠灵魂寄托和奉献;
•三者混合好比是文艺复兴时期以后,是灵魂回归肉体力量、回归的过程充斥着游戏责任。
婚姻色彩的寓意。
工业革命以后,西方社会流行一个说法:婚姻是契约,是爱情的坟墓。可是,今年年初,世界著名的调查皮尤统计的报告说明,“后现代化”以来,即对工业革命反思以来,婚姻还保持着很沉重的契约成分、但不再是爱情的坟墓。报告统计如下:
统计说明,把爱情作为婚姻目标的人数比例最高,即绝大多数人把爱情作为婚姻的开始、也作为婚姻的归宿;婚姻不再是爱情的坟墓、而是爱情的延续和扩展。统计显示,把契约成分最浓郁的“财政稳定”作为婚姻目标的人数比例是最低的;那反映了男女财政独立平等的社会进步,也反映了契约对婚姻生活的影响的降低。
其它婚姻目标,譬如“规范生活”、“长期伙伴”和“生儿育女”,都是以游戏责任和游戏规则为主要特征的,它们也是婚姻目标,但明显是排在“为了爱情”之后。
值得一提的是,就已婚者和未婚者而言,把“财政稳定”作为婚姻目标的人数比例差别最小,而把“长期伙伴”作为婚姻目标的人数比例差别最大。那说明,就“婚姻是契约”而论,未婚者和已婚者的心理状态大致相同,而对“长期伙伴”所意味的游戏责任及其关系则有很大的心理差距、已婚者更强调婚姻生活中的游戏责任。
皮尤的统计报告显示了“爱情至上”成为绝大多数人的婚姻目标,那也许为李约翰的“爱情色彩”理论能在西方社会多年来一直十分流行而提供了一个社会解释。
小结:爱情色彩还是没有解答的问题。
由此,我想到:若弗洛伊德还在世,他看了李约翰的“爱情色彩”理论,会怎么想呢?会不会认为李约翰终于突破了他的局限而可以深刻地洞察女人的灵魂、从而可以很清楚地知道女人到底想要什么了呢?是否说明男人可以借助“爱情色彩”理论而深深地窥视女人的心灵了呢?我不知道,一点也不知道。但有一点已经很清楚了:1990年代开始、即李约翰的“爱情色彩”理论问世后20来年,美国教育部门把“爱情色彩”论列入了公民教育考察内容,而美国卫生部则把“爱情色彩”论列入了公民保健考察内容。
后记:
有读者通讯说,女人另有三爱、也可配上色彩,譬如:女儿的爱,红色;妻子的爱,蓝色;母亲的爱,黄色。由此也可有许多混合而有许多色彩的女性爱情。然而,在李约翰资料里,我没看到他是怎么说的,我就不知道在本文中应该怎么说了。不过,有了【爱情色彩】理论的框架,个人怎么应用就是个人如何选择和如何发挥的事情了。
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所有跟帖:
• 专业的解读。“女儿的爱,红色;妻子的爱,蓝色;的爱,黄色。”,什么的爱是黄色的呢? -laopika- (0 bytes) (3 reads) 09/29/2024 postreply 08:57:03
• 我怎么觉得应该是情人的爱,妻子的爱,和妈妈的爱啊! -然后呢- (0 bytes) (1 reads) 09/29/2024 postreply 12:19:46
• Le文章有,母亲的爱黄色,心爱也是黄色 -云霞姐姐- (0 bytes) (0 reads) 09/29/2024 postreply 21:41:12
• 好思考,好研究,爱情的答案本来就是因人而异,不同的教育,生活环境,成长背景,会有不同的答案 -云霞姐姐- (0 bytes) (2 reads) 09/29/2024 postreply 13:37:53
• 记得一句话说:“女人的心多变,如一本书,不翻到最后一页,你就不知道答案”,认同,所以,别猜,猜不透!嘻嘻嘻 -云霞姐姐- (0 bytes) (1 reads) 09/29/2024 postreply 13:40:25
• 说的精辟。。。猜::狗+青。年青的狗, 猜也白猜。:)) -zhiyanle- (0 bytes) (1 reads) 09/29/2024 postreply 14:01:10
• 狗的忠诚是本性,不用猜,女人的心,就是一个神秘园,嘻嘻 -云霞姐姐- (0 bytes) (1 reads) 09/29/2024 postreply 14:10:52
• 《神秘园之歌》也许能给你的文章添色 -云霞姐姐-
在这,凄美的曲子
(246 bytes) (11 reads) 09/29/2024 postreply 15:07:42
• thanks... -zhiyanle- (0 bytes) (0 reads) 09/29/2024 postreply 15:22:02
• 说实话,我从来没有对这些颜色做过对应,也不太敢多想……有点晕了 :) -老林子里的夏天- (0 bytes) (1 reads) 09/29/2024 postreply 14:09:33
• 下次还有更晕的,,抱朴子。。。 -zhiyanle- (0 bytes) (1 reads) 09/29/2024 postreply 14:30:39
• 抱朴子,养生论,Le,你咋啥都知道, -云霞姐姐- (0 bytes) (1 reads) 09/29/2024 postreply 14:38:13
• 被动被迫地学了些。。。 -zhiyanle- (0 bytes) (0 reads) 09/29/2024 postreply 14:45:26
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