Dear Miss FanFan,

Dear Miss FanFan,

Being an overseas Chinese who understands his female counterpart, I am privileged to understand your position, admiration and aspiration. Being a man whose profession involves mingling with entrepreneurs, I am privy to men’s view on women and more particularly, small talks in the locker room. I would like to make some comments on you, your future Mr Right, and your relationship, because it appears that

a) you invite comments
b) your relationship with your Mr Right is an upstart and is at stake

Just as a pretty girl’s guard is naturally against sexual predator, an entrepreneur is alert to asset predatory relationships. Obviously, you care about his asset almost as much as he cares about your youth and beauty. As you said, your greatest advantage over the girls in this forum is clarity in knowing what you want. The anxiety of getting what you want from each other is one thing, the practice of starring at each other’s part of interest is quite another. To alleviate the feeling of being preyed on, one would do the exact opposite—try not to reveal one’s eagerness too readily. In your case, a discussion in sexuality and money’s stead could be long overdue.

This is just the start. You are at the beginning of a relationship, I gathered. Your aim is to become his lawfully wedded wife and rightly so. But it takes much more to become a wife than becoming an interesting girlfriend of the year. In addition to being a permanent girlfriend, a wife candidate promises motherhood to both the upcoming children and the man of the house.
 
I know, I know. It is not easy marrying the right man, let alone a rich man who is right for you. Human brain is the biggest and the most prominent sex organ. To capitalize on sexuality as a woman’s asset, a woman has to think like a man. Sounds too Freudian? Okay, let me make it simpler. To most women, business, politics, sports and their other pet topics are boring. Or at least not as interesting as handbags, shoes and hairdos. Fortunately or unfortunately, by aiming at becoming his wife, you undertook to make at least some of these topics interesting to you.

A girlfriend is often more engaged in escalating a relationship than a wife. This could demand your learning to understand the world from a man’s, and more particularly your entrepreneur boyfriend’s perspective. Many ladies in this forum have done well in this regard. To start with, some of them have mastered the English language. With this advantage, they have gained great insights into their husbands’ role in the wider society.

To me, reading their posts in either English or Chinese is almost as daunting as courting and keeping a rich and pretty woman. Let us both work hard on our skills in keeping our life companions good company. I wish you the best of luck in becoming his wife and stay being one.


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Miss FanFan's original piece of work.

1. My bf lives in VA. His companies do business in IT consulting and government reseller. I do nto want to talk more about that as I am afraid in that forum, maybe some IT ladies work at his company.

2. About $250m. My bf did tell me that the company’s 2007 income is $250m currently. He worked hard to hit $1000mm. but still cannot. That is the reason that I was surprised that that lady said about $250m. Yes he is really rich guy in our eyes. His divorce, which lasted for a long time, costed him tons of money. Just lawyer fee costed him $250,000. But he joked that why the divorce is so expensive. His friend said that it is because it is worth!

3. Chinese ladies here always think that it is hard or impossible for a Chinese girl to date or panshang a rich and talented and comparatively not old guy. So when I posted my story here, tons of bad words came out. But you ladies ignored a thing , that is, I am excellent too!!!! Many ladies thought I was bragging. You wrong!!! My family thought the same ways as u ladies before. They always said : fanfan, just wait until you get it!! But the truth and my experience since my 12 years old changed their thought to me completely, esp. my dad, a strong and capable man!!! Someday, on the phone, he said to me : fanfan, you are right, everything u said (although it was impossible in our eyes) have become the truth. You are my and our pride.

4. I am very honest. Generally girls are afraid that their bfs do nto like their strong personality or too strong. I directly told my bf that I am very goal-oriented, I never failed with what I wanted. My bf said: knew you were very smart... I will root for .now I have to make *me* your next project so you work very hard not to fail at it too... lol ;)

5. I have ever asked my bf why he is interested in me(I thought he just likes pretty girl). Here is his answer: No, you silly girl... but being very pretty does not hurt!!I like a few things about you, right from the start:- confident, energetic, and pasionate-know what u want- good career- intelligent- good with fashion- beautiful- fun to chat withSo, I love you for MORE than just your looks... but I really do like your looks too... My bf deleted his profile from Yahoo Personals before our 3rd date. I think those online dating ladies should know what it means!!In my eyes, my bf is very talented guy. nto a lot of guys can be a vice president iin a large internatinal IT companies in his early 30's!! and then founded 2 profitable companies!!

6. I think I am different from most Chinese ladies including Deng Wendi.I acted not like most Chinese ladies who are humble, etc. I am not humble at all! Why I have to be modest ??? unnecessary!! Also, the outstanding personality of mine is : I always know that I want!!! I always passionately work hard on what I want. I am always teh controller of life!! I am never the slave of the life!! I am different from Deng Wendi because I do not and will not marry an old guy who can be my father ! I am 29, my bf 41, perfect age match!! Also, I am selfish , I just pay attention on my enjoyment . It means that I just get enjoyed on what I get by my own effort and energy!! I am seeking a guy whose income is not low because I will not be happy if his income is lower than I( IN the usa, generally, high income shows a person’s ability!) Please do not compare me with anyone else. I am myself!

7. somebody challenged me about the difference among cash, profit, and gross income, or the like. I must tell u that I am at much higher level than you at this aspect. (If I am telling u CPA is one of my licenses, do you believe?). To evaluate a person’s income, esp. those partners. You cannot just see his book income. Under the help of the good accountant, his profit could be 0 or loss to avoid be taxed. But his cash distribution could be millions!!! And these cash distribution is free of tax in his personal tax return.

8. As for 修不修得成正果. I guess just like you ladies cannot guarantee that you will not divorce, right?