亮亮6岁来美,在中国的中文是从幼儿园里和家里学的。从小学1年级到现在11年级都一直在美国。中间也没有回国。中文学校上了几天。他的中文是通过和我们讲话,看中文电视剧,偶尔读读人民日报海外版上学中文栏目的文章维持。他在二年级时有一段时间总想和我用英文对话,但我仍坚持用中文回答他。后来就形成了习惯。到现在他和我们,我们的朋友,或GRANDPARENTS讲中文,和他同龄的小朋友讲英文。即使他外出在车上打电话告诉他在哪里也用中文。我想和他用英文讲他都不和我讲。即使是这样,他读写的能力差的比较远。就是讲也是加着英文。偶尔用错,能让我笑出泪来。 言归正传,讲讲他中文派上用场的两件事: 去年9月,马友友到我们刚刚离开的那个小城演奏,亮亮原来的大提琴老师是乐团的首席,也是邀请YO YO MA的联系人。他安排在音乐会后让他的几个学生和YO YO MA见面。亮亮也就有了这个机会。当我们在外面等亮亮出来后,他一脸兴奋的样子。不光SHOW给我们YO YO MA 签名的CD和照片,还说当轮到他和YO YO MA 见面的时候,他问YO YO MA:“CAN YOU SPEAK CHINESE”,他说,YO YO MA 就开始用中文和他讲话。告诉他小时候也学中文。亮亮觉得能在他的同学面前和提琴大师用中文对话是一件很SPECIAL的事。也挺得意的:) 另一件是最近的SCHOLAR BOWL的比赛。有点类似智力竞赛,他们队和另一所高中比赛时有录像并在当地电台播出。比赛结果他们队以500多对200多的大比分胜出。在看他比赛的录像之前,亮亮告诉我说,赛题中有两道是和中国有关的。他都答对了。一道题问2008奥运会的举办地,那不是撞在枪口上。另一道题是问“THE MEANING OF GREAT PEACE“中文怎么说。我看他稍沉了一下,然后按键,答:“太平”。他是那场比赛的唯一的中国人。他说这样的题如果他答不上来就有点丢面子了。 再把TIME杂志上的一些信息与大家分享:这是亮亮昨晚吃饭时看完后用中文为主,英文为辅告诉我的。我觉得有些信息还是满对的。就读了这两篇文章。第一篇文章的TITLE IS Why some people are most likely to succeed: Ambition. There are no hard rules for the kinds of families that turn out the highest achievers. Most psychologists agree that parents who set tough but realistic challenges, applaud successes and go easy on failures produce kids with the greatest self-confidence. (pp. 53). When measuring ambition, anthropologist divide families into four categories: poor, struggling but getting by, upper middle class, and rich. For members of the first two groups, who are fighting just to keep the electricity on and the phone bill paid, ambition is often a luxury. For the rich, it's often unnecessary. It's members of the upper middle class, reasonably safe economically but not so safe that so bad break couldn't spell catastrophe, who are most driven to improve their lot. "It's called status anxiety," says anthroplogist Lowe, "and whether you're born to be concerned about it or not, you do develop it. (pp.53-54). As a group, immigrant children in his study are outperforming their U.S-born peers. What's more, the adults are dramatically outperforming the immigrant families that came before them. "one hundred years ago, it took people two to three generations to achieve a middle-class standard of living," says Suarez Orozco. "Today they're getting there within a generation." (pp. 57). Another article: Ambition and kids: How to help them succeed? "Kids can given the opportunities (to become passionate about a subject or activity), but they can't be forced," says Jacquelynne Eccles, a psychology professor at the University of Michigan, who led a landmark, 25-year study examining what motivated first and seventh-graders in three school districts. By instilling confidence, encouraging some risk taking, being accepting of failure and expanding the areas in which children may be successful, both parents and teachers can reignite that innate desire to achieve. Many educators attribute a sudden lack of motivation to a fear of failure or peer pressure that conveys the message that doing well academically somehow isn't cool. "Kids get so caught up in the moment-to-moment issue of will they look smart or dumb, and it blocks them from thinking about the long term," says Carol Dweck, a psychology professor at Stanford."YOU HAVE TO TEACH TEHM THAT THEY ARE IN CHARGE OF THEIR INTELLECTURAL GROWTH." 如果大家能有耐心看到这里,真是难为我们每一个做家长的一份苦心。CHEERS!!