拉破车的司机

小的时候,我有一次在冬天去看电影。在电影院的一扇上了霜的玻璃上,不知道是谁写了几个外文字。我看见了,心里很是羡慕。心里想如果自己也能讲一口很多人都不会的外语,写出一些很多人都不懂的外文单词,该多有面子。也许从那时起,我就下了决心将来一定要学好外语。

上了中学开始学外语。开始我好象并没有入门。不过第一次测验,我居然考了第一,使我学好外语的自信心大增。从此我的外语成绩一直居于上游。

上初三准备考高中之前,我突然心血来潮。感觉自己很空闲,应该用这些时间再学一门外语。于是我开始买书,买磁带,准备自学英语。结果被我的老师知道了,对我一顿狠批。我满腔热情顷刻化为乌有。外语没学成,时间也都浪费了,根本没用来学习其他功课。

后来在大学,看见其他同学每天都为了过英语四级而忙得两脚朝天(很多人是锻炼身体,拿大顶),我暗自庆幸,幸好自己没学英语,不用考四级。后来出国高潮迭起,周围的人不断冲出国门,走向世界。可看看自己,要出国,也只能去西伯利亚。真恨我的班主任为什么那个时候不让我学英语。不过东方红,太阳升,中国出了个新西方,使得我这种人一下子在绝望中看到了希望。我跑到了新西方学校,经过几个月强化培训,我终于能够分清了ABCD。什么托福,GRE,什么雅思,凡是出国考试我全考个遍。最后终于被我骗到了奖学美金,跑到对敌斗争的最前线。投身于做资本主义掘墓人的伟大事业中去。

不过这么多年,我仍然保持每天看看老毛子语的的新闻、资料的习惯。甚至做梦在梦里都讲毛子话(比我妹妹强点,她睡觉有时候说梦话。都是用俄语说的梦话)。将来有时间,我一定去罗刹。我把我自己的老毛子名都想好了,叫拉破车的斯基。不但如此,将来我的孩子的名字我也想好了,可以叫开奔驰的斯基,开奥迪的斯基,最差也得是开桑塔娜的斯基,绝对不能叫开大发的司机。

 

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