兄弟姐妹之间亲密的秘密

【RAISING BOYS FIT TO CHANGE THE WORLD】
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"That's mine!" "No fair!" "Give it back!" "She's cheating."

如果有多个孩子,这些争吵您一定很熟悉。事实上,估计这也是您日常生活的一部分。所以,有时候我真想知道孩子之间什么时候能不吵架。还好,有盼望:研究表明,孩子们之间的争吵通常当大点的孩子到13岁,小点的到10岁基本就停止了。(看来在孩子年龄如果能差13岁最好,哈哈)。不过等13年有点太长了,能不能在这之前做点别的来增进孩子们之间的关系呢?有!但有些您不见得敢用,例如,把夫妻关系搞紧张,因为同样的研究标明在这种情况下孩子会彼此寻找安慰,因此关系会得到改善。看来我们还是说一些可行的吧。

1 建立良好的母子关系,注意是母子,不是父子。怎么建立,呵呵,得您自己探索,多读书多交流,包括多看我的BLOG。

2 让孩子re-visit他们之间的争吵。通常当事件过了,孩子们都平静了,开个小会,看彼此之间能否达成妥协,找出一个都可以接受的方法。

参见:
Research Reveals Secret Causes of Sibling Spats
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