王尔德论自私

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自私并不等于是一个人按自己的意愿而生活,而是要他人按自己的意愿生活。一个无私的人总是能尊重他人独处的需要,不干预他人的生活。自私的人总是要在自己身边创造出一种绝对单一的氛围。无私的人,却能认识到多样化是一种令人愉快的风格,从而接受之,默许之,享受之。以自我为中心的思考并非是自私的行为。一个不能这样做的人其实就是一个完全不能思考的人。强求他人俺自己的方式思考,从而禀赋同一的观点,这其实才是令人作呕的自私。为什么别人非要和自己一样呢?如果他人能思考,他人一定会有不同样式的思考。如果他人不能思考,那么要他人有任何一种思想都是绝不可能的事。一朵红玫瑰本身是毫无自私可言的,但如果这朵红玫瑰一定要整个花园的花都是玫瑰,并且都是红色,那才是惊人的自私。”
---奥斯卡 王尔德
 
“Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live. And unselfishness is letting other people's lives alone, not interfering with them. Selfishness always aims at creating around it an absolute uniformity of type. Unselfishness recognises infinite variety of type as a delightful thing, accepts it, acquiesces in it, enjoys it. It is not selfish to think for oneself. A man who does not think for himself does not think at all. It is grossly selfish to require of one's neighbour that he should think in the same way, and hold the same opinions. Why should he? If he can think, he will probably think differently. If he cannot think, it is monstrous to require thought of any kind from him. A red rose is not selfish because it wants to be a red rose. It would be horribly selfish if it wanted all the other flowers in the garden to be both red and roses."
---Oscar Wilde
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