1 什么叫叛徒?/What is a traitor?
Young hopeful: "Father, what is a traitor in politics?"
Father (a veteran politician):"A traitor is a man who leaves our party and goes over to the other one."
Young hopeful: "Well then, what is a man who leaves his party and comes over to yours?"
Father: "A convert, my son."
有希望的青年人：“父亲，什么叫政治叛徒?”
父亲(一位老资格的政治家)：“叛徒指的是离开我们党而加入到另一个党的人。”
有希望的青年人：“那么，离开他的党而加入到我们党的人又叫什么呢?”
父亲：“叫改变信仰者，我的儿子。”
2 水的分子式
Teacher: What is the chemical formula for water?
Blonde: HIJKLMNO!!
Teacher: What are you talking about?
Blonde: Yesterday you said it’s H to O!
老师：水的分子式是什么?
花瓶：HIJKLMNO!!
老师：你在说什么?
花瓶：昨天你不是说H to O吗?
3 如果我是一个经理
One day in class, the teacher assigned his students to write a composition – if I Am a Manager.
All the students began to write except a boy. The teacher went to him and asked the reason.
“I am waiting for my secretary,” was the boy’s answer.
一天课上，老师要同学们以“如果我是一个经理”为题写一篇作文。
所有的学生都在动笔写了，只有一个男生例外。老师走过去问他为什么不写。
“我在等我的秘书”。那孩子答道。
4 不是我的错
Mother (reprimanding her small daughter): You mustn't pull the cat's tail.
Daughter: I'm only holding it, Mom. The cat's doing the pulling.
妈妈(正教训她的女儿)：你不该拽猫的尾巴。
女儿：妈，我只是握着猫尾巴，它自己在拽。
5 欠揍的理发师
Being rather bald，I have long been used to comforting myself on a visit to the hairdresser with the opening gambit， “Grass doesn’t grow on a busy street.”
However，I was not prepared for the response of one barber， “We always say there’s no sense in putting a roof on the barren land.”
每次去美发中心的时候，我总是以一句自我安慰的话，来提及我那近乎秃顶的脑袋，“繁华的马路不会长草。”
没想到，有位理发师这样应了我一句：“我们是认为，荒芜的土地就不需要有屋顶。”
6 学地理
Misha is a pupil in Grade 5 and has just begun studying geography. One day after supper, Misha's father asked Do you like geography，Misha?”
"Yes，Dad，I like it very much.” Misha said.
"You learned about the density of population in various parts in the world” Misha’s father asked.
"Yes，of course，we have." Misha answered.
“Do you know where people are the most populous?” Misha’s father asked.
Misha didn't answer immediately. He thought and thought，and then he burst out， “People are the most populous in the bus on Sunday.”
米沙是小学五年级的学生，刚开始学地理。一天晚饭后，他爸爸问他:“米沙，你喜欢地理吗?”
“喜欢，爸爸，我非常喜欢。”米沙说。
“你们学过世界不同地区的人口密度吗?”爸爸问。
“当然学过。”米沙回答。
“你知道哪儿的人口密度最大吗?”爸爸又问。
米沙没有马上回答，他想了好一会儿，然后突然大声叫道:“星期天的公共汽车上人口密度最大。”
