Most of us understand that our words possess the power to build people up or tear them down. Yet too often, we ignore that truth in the most important arena of all: our home. It is vital that husbands and wives speak positively to each other, and especially important that parents speak positive words into the lives of their children, even in life’s tough spots.
Not long ago, our 9–year–old came home teary–eyed and told me that his friend’s dog had died. The dog was more that 16 years old and like a member of the family. After comforting Jonathan in his sadness, I knew I had a choice. I could commiserate with him and enter into the mourning. Or, I could help him see the positive side.
"Wow!" I said. "That dog lived a good, long life! I’ll bet that dog lived so long because he lived in Josh’s house and was surrounded by love."
Jonathan’s eyes widened with astonishment. "I’m going to tell that to Josh!" he said, happy that he had found some words to comfort his friend.
Women especially can set the tone for their households, creating with our words and demeanor either a positive or a negative atmosphere. The Bible says, "A wise woman builds her house, while a foolish woman tears hers down by her own efforts." The Scripture says to encourage one another daily, and one of the best ways a wife and mom can do that is by speaking positive, encouraging words to her children and her husband.
I constantly tell my family the things I appreciate about them. God is a rewarder of our faith; it pleases Him when we also "reward" our family members with praise for their godly behavior, proper use of their talents and good attitudes.
My husband and I are excited about our relationship with God, and we love sharing our sense of awe and amazement with our children. We want our kids to know that living for God is not a grueling grind; it’s an exciting adventure!
Even when I must discipline our children, I attempt to remain positive. My goal is to train our children – to teach them rather than punish them. I try to emphasize what our children are doing right, rather than focusing on what they have done wrong. Most of all, I reinforce how much I love them.
Praying with our children is another way of building positive principles into their lives. Each day, before I drop our kids off at school, we hold hands and pray for the school, their teachers and friends. I speak words of blessing over them, telling them, "You have the favor of God." And I encourage them to go out and be a blessing to others.
Possibly one of the most important ways a woman can influence her family is by praying with and for her husband. The positive and encouraging words you speak over your mate will have an impact on every aspect of his life – at home and in his career – and will help him to be a spiritual leader.
Keeping your words consistently positive is a key to speaking into your family members’ lives. They may not appreciate what you are saying right now. But the Bible says, "Let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not."
If you will help your family find the good in every situation, in due season, you and your family members will reap the harvest of your positive, encouraging words.
VICTORIA OSTEEN
A life–long Houstonian, Victoria began her career in her family's business. Now as a supportive wife, mother of two children and a co–pastor of Lakewood Church in Houston, TX. Victoria is an inspiration and mentor to women everywhere. She is committed to helping women, children and families discover their purpose and reach their highest potential in Christ.
