【林子大,什么鸟都有】

不知何时开始,喜欢上随笔拾趣,记录多姿多彩的生活,不知何时开始,喜欢和朋友们分享触动心弦的点点滴滴,蓦然回首,恍然大悟,原来这就是文学的真谛
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工作至今,突然有股莫名的冲动要揭露某些食品厂商sales的千姿百态。初始,来自书香门第,拥有雅致傲骨的我初生牛犊不怕虎,凭借父亲遗传的一贯优良品质,倒是和sales们相处甚欢。不过,随着时间的推移,逐渐让我感觉到某些sales的丑态百出。大致分为三种: 1 口灿莲花,能言善道型 。2 笑里藏刀型,杀人不见血 3 倚老卖老型,拿着鸡毛当令箭 。

第一种,话说这位老女sales,脸皮之厚,相信她对《厚黑学》深有研读,无人能及, 一进超市,初次见面,她就施展三寸不烂之舌,滔滔不绝,口沫横飞,不知不觉,谈话结束。她球员兼裁判,越俎代庖,自己订完货,自己安排好demo, 接起铃声正好响起的电话,挥一挥手,留下欲言又止的我。效率之高,让我瞠目结舌,仿佛我只是傀儡。

第二种,这种带有深沉橘诡笑容的Sales暗藏心机,让你防不胜防。唯一应付绝招是以不变应万变,坐怀不乱。举例说明,话说某一天,此位男sales风尘仆仆迎面而来,脸上带着虚伪的笑容,又鞠躬又奉承,让我瞬间感觉轻飘飘,无比舒畅。嘘寒问暖间尽是聊家常,毫无涉及订货事宜,不久,我终于卸下心防,任凭摆布,打印完PO,对方扬长而去,我才恍然大悟,原来如此。

第三种,倚老卖老型,拿着鸡毛当令箭。此等老江湖老谋深算已成精,自视经验丰富,行骗无敌手。举例说明,初次见面,此sales就高谈阔论以往之丰功伟绩,和某某老板一起打天下,见识过无数战役,堪称sales界的元老,无人不识,无人不给面子。还威胁加利诱单纯善良的我,不订什么货,少订货,他会亲自上报我老板,让我吃不了兜着走。可惜了,我天怕地不怕,继承父亲的正气凛然,三个字赠送给他 : 滚,滚,滚。。。有多远滚多远。

林子大,什么鸟都有,经过这几年和形形色色的Sales打交道,受益颇多,如今也可以兵来将挡,水来土掩,应付自如了。

 

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