小姚成长日记(二)之人生从半岁开始

给女儿一个回忆童年的去处,努力寻找生活中残存的乐趣。
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时光飞逝如电啊,这个月的18号我就半岁了。本来从出生到现在我一直是沉默的, 不过最近发生的一些事情让我不能再保持沉默了,也让我开始思考一个哲学问题:人生从多大开始?

    答案:至少从半岁开始。

    我之所以这样讲是有原因的。本来应该是纯洁无瑕,自由自在的婴儿时期,由于成人的风言风语,让我最近觉得比较苦恼,也很纠结。问题就出在我的体型上。

    官方的记录:身高高于75%的同龄孩子,体重重于90%的孩子。身高还是值得小小骄傲一下的,问题就出在这个体重上。

    我最近社交活动比较多,也成了大家围观的对象。于是评头品足,说三道四,让我窒息。什么鼻子小嘴巴大,什么面部表情严肃耍大牌,这都哪儿跟哪儿啊,我妈还说我跟她比还算是优化了呢(英文叫:upgrade). 人言可畏啊。

    据说不会说话的人耳朵特别好使,我深深地体会到了这一点。我清楚地记得,一个叫O的阿姨说我跟气吹得一样,我郁闷。气吹能吹得这么标致吗?这叫宇宙间的能量守恒。你没看到我妈都瘦了吗?

    最可气的是前几天爸爸推着我遛弯,遇到一个小白孩儿,9个月,典型的营养不良,比我似乎小一套。她妈听说我才半岁,竟然夸张的瞪大了眼睛,说:she is huge. 卖糕的。你说有什么大惊小怪的。在美国经济萧条的大背景下,我们老中未雨绸缪,家有余粮,生活条件好一些也是应该的嘛。我胖,胖得有理。

    回头想想我每天的饮食:母乳两袋,胡萝卜糊糊半瓶,米粉糊糊少许。周而复始,一勺一勺,味同嚼蜡。我自己还郁闷呢。还被外人拿体型说事。

    罢了,人生才开始呢。

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