To Evan

[A few videos of real-life violence were instructive to me. One was when a

referee floored a fighter with a slick back kick after judo-throwing his coach

who jumped in the ring and insulted and spitted at the umpire. Another was when

a Gracie shot in head-first for a clinch, a signature move in Gracie Jiu-Jitsu,

at the start of a fight. The last came on May 1, when Evan, a teenage basketball

player for the South Bay Snipers, got a nasty punch as he turned to face Tyrone

(a made-up name) and his friend as they called him a Chink.

I think whoever watched and learned from the video owed Evan a thank-you for the

invaluable lesson. With the benefit of the hindsight, I wish I could talk to him

or send him a letter as follows.]

Dear Evan,

How are you?

It might be painful, but I'd like to review the video where you were attacked

and see if we can learn something together.

First of all, I think you would agree that sports are mimic warfare. When there is

a conflict, therefore, treat it as a self-defense situation. As such, you should

not walk with your arms down into the hitting range of your opponent.

What was your intention as you turned around, Evan? To get closer to push him?

Or did you think he would apologize because you faced him? You didn't have a

clear idea what was going to happen. (Neither did I but sadly, you showed me.)

It was an instinct that you need to overcome.

The slur seemed an intentional and calculated trap. From his stance and raised arms,

I think Tyrone knew some boxing and was ready to jab. The war already broke out

the instant he called you a Chink. You were out-numbered at the moment. Just keep

on walking away and get ready to defend yourself.

Am I asking you to feel no rage at the taunt? I know it would be a tall order at

your (and even my) age, but that's exactly what I wish you (and I) could do,

like a Stoic.

Day and night, train your body and mind. When insulted, reply "Good for you."

and move on and become even better. When you do have to fight, e.g., when lives

are on the line, your fight has to have teeth. It has to be swift and devastating.

Don't warn or threaten and absolutely no telegraphing.

I hope you recover well.

Sincerely Yours

7grizzly

PS: The sucker-punch that a 75-year-old Asian woman in Elmhurst NY suffered was

of a similar style. The two were walking toward each other and as they were about

to pass, the guy threw a left punch. It was again a surprise attack.